Month: February 2004

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Stairway to Heaven Backwards – Interpretation

I have been pretty excited about the traffic my Stairway to Heaven Backwards page has been generating lately. It has been getting just under the 5000 mark for the last three days. In honor of the high hit count, I have decided to post a few of the comments that I received about the page lately. I am also thinking about creating a place for comments on the actual page.

I suppose I should mention that I am posting these messages verbatim so those of you with delicate sensibilities may find the language in one of the posts offensive.

“Hello..

My name is Haukur and I live in Iceland. I just saw your flash thing on stairway to heaven and I think it’s awesome. How in the world did they do that? So I was wondering if you have the rest of the backwards lyrics in text that you can e-mail me? If you could then that would be great.

Thanks in advance…”

Well honestly I don’t know how Led Zeppelin did that, or if they even did it on purpose. I did try reading the forwards lyrics myself and playing them backwards and the backwards recording did sound like the same message you hear when playing the song backwards.

I don’t know the rest of the backwards lyrics in other places in the song so I couldn’t tell you. Sorry.

“Hi

I have just heard and seen the backwards thing that you made about the song Stairway to Heaven. I have heard these things too but not to the extent that you have showed. There is another part in the song where the lyrics go “your stairway lies on the whispering winds.” I have heard this to say “I smoke weed for Satan” when you play it backwards on the record. There are supposed to be other parts but that is the one that stuck out to me when I heard it. You did well on this. Except on the lyrics part you have them wrong. They go “there are two paths you can go by” you have “there are two paths you can go back.” No big deal. But I always try to tell my friends about this and they never believe me so I will send them a link to it. Thanks a bunch.

BEN”

Thanks for the update. I’ll double check to make sure I have the right lyrics and update the page when I am back in Lethbridge.

“hey man i dont htink thats real cause the lyrics bacwards dont match it fowards there completely different and where the fuck did 666 come from dude its not right..u need to stop telllin ppl fake shit and stop makin up this stuff”

Actually I have to admit I did make up the “reverse lyrics”. I based them on what other webpages said you were supposed to hear and what I, myself, heard. I realize that a lot of people only hear the message when they click on the show reverse lyrics button and play it but nevertheless it makes one think about the power of suggestion and how people hear what they want to, or in your case I guess you don’t hear what you don’t want to.

“im not one to say anything is fake or done for kick’s but my curiosity of listening to this a few times i have to know how did you find out how to reverse it and what besides what you said gave you the idea to do this. i mean i am a “led zeppelin” fan non-the less but like i said its odd how for a song called stair way to heaven it has satantic writings. i mean exactly how would someone figure something like this out?.

sincerly.
misa,16″

Well Misa, as far as this being fake, it is what it is. The fact is that when you play parts of Stairway to Heaven backwards, it sounds like there are satanic messages. Now whether or not the messages were intentional is an entirely different story and frankly it makes no difference (that is just my opinion though).

You said something along the lines of how odd it is that a song called Stairway to Heaven has satanic messages in it. I do not think it is actually that odd. Now I am no expert so what I am about to say is mostly opinion. If I remember correctly the song is about Lilith (Adams first Wife in Hebrew Mythology). The lyrics are pretty ambiguous but they tell a story of a lady (notice she is never called a woman – this is significant if you read about Lilith) who is trying to get to heaven. Here is the first stanza:

There’s a lady who’s sure all that glitters is gold
And she’s buying a stairway to heaven
And when she gets there she knows if the stores are closed
With a word she can get what she came for

So instead of getting to Heaven through Christ (as Christian religion teaches is the only way to heaven) she is trying to buy her way to heaven with money. This is sort of alluding to the story of the Tower of Babel in that the people in that story are building their way to heaven. But when she gets to Heaven the stores are closed. I would have thought the word “doors” would have been more appropriate than “stores” nevertheless I guess “stores” emphasizes the idea not only that the doors are closed but also that you cant buy things in heaven. She does know that a password will get her what she wants. I guess the lyrics imply that there is a special word you need to say to get into heaven.

There’s a sign on the wall but she wants to be sure
And you know sometimes words have two meanings
In the tree by the brook there’s a songbird who sings
Sometimes all of our thoughts are misgiven

Frankly I have no idea what the sign on the wall is referring to. It is obviously some kind of message or rules (considering that’s what most signs are). She is uncertain, however, as to the meaning of the sign. Words having more than one meaning could be in reference to the fact that if you play the song backwards you will hear messages but more probably it is just the fact that a lot of times the rules or instructions in life (especially coming from religious sources) are often very confusing. Remember this is all just opinion. The songbird who sings in the tree by the brook also alludes me. I guess a songbird could be a messenger or perhaps an angel – either way the lyrics read that sometimes all of our thoughts are misgiven so whoever or whatever the songbird represents we might not understand correctly anyway. Again perhaps in reference to the fact that words have more than one meaning.

There’s a feeling I get when I look to the west
And my spirit is crying for leaving
In my thoughts I have seen rings of smoke through the trees
And the voices of those who stand looking

Here is my attempt at this stanza. If the song is about Lilith then maybe looking to the west is her looking back on Eden from her new home East of Eden after she was ousted from the Garden for being a bad helpmate to Adam. Her spirit is crying for leaving Eden and she remembers the smoke through the trees (smoke in Old Testament times was often symbolic of the smoke from the cleansing power of god and as such used in burning altars). The voices of those who stand looking would be the Gods talking to Adam in the garden.

And it’s whispered that soon, if we all call the tune
Then the piper will lead us to reason
And a new day will dawn for those who stand long
And the forest will echo with laughter

I would guess that this is talking about how if we all are good believers that Christ will come to earth and lead us to truth. The new day is the millennium and those who stand long are those that never give up their faith. The forest echoing with laughter is a return to Eden.

If there’s a bustle in your hedgerow
Don’t be alarmed now
It’s just a spring clean for the May Queen

Yes there are two paths you can go by
but in the long run
There’s still time to change the road you’re on

This is the section of the song that when played backwards sounds like satanic messages. If there’s a bustle in your hedgerow could be talking about the wicked people of the earth and the spring clean might be the cleansing of the earth both by water (the Biblical story of Noah and the Ark) and by fire (John the Revelator’s explaination of what’s going to happen before the Second Coming). The two paths you can go by are symbolic and allude to following the path God has set out for us or following a path set by Lucifer. Even in the long run, there’s still time to change the road you’re on. I guess this means you can go ahead and procrastinate the day of your repentance – a different message than you would get from most pastors’ points of view.

Your head is humming and it won’t go because you don’t know
The piper’s calling you to join him
Dear lady can’t you hear the wind blow and did you know
Your stairway lies on the whispering wind

So if all of this confusing you it’s because you don’t know what is right. The piper’s calling you to join him (still assuming this is Christ calling for you to repent). The lady, Lilith, has her stairway on the wind – not a very solid foundation to say the least.

And as we wind on down the road
Our shadows taller than our souls
There walks a lady we all know
Who shines white light and wants to show
How everything still turns to gold
And if you listen very hard
The tune will come to you at last
When all are one and one is all
To be a rock and not to roll
Woe oh oh oh oh oh
And she’s buying a stairway to heaven

As the artists make their way through life, the road that they chose is leading them to darkness not light. Our shadows taller than our souls. The lady we all know is probably Lilith – shining in white light and showing how everything that glitters is gold. She is however only imitating God. That’s the whole point of the song. The Stairway to Heaven is an imitation created to make you think you can make it to heaven on your own. The tune will come to you at last – it will all make sense one day when all people have united in the one true religion and the rock coming down the mountain will be a solid foundation (not to roll). I think he’s implying that following the path he’s chosen is the right one, but remember the point of the song is imitation. Lilith is still buying a stairway to heaven.

Not that I believe any of this.

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My Trip to Edmonton

The 6 hour drive itself was pretty uneventful. I did see a guy trying to drive and play his guitar. If you thought using a cell phone and driving was bad… What was that guy thinking?

I stopped in Calgary for dinner with Mom, Dad, and Gary and then picked up a Valentines Day present for Anna-Maria. Then after being informed how unwelcome I was at Garys house I left for Edmonton. Yes, I am more than a little offended.

I guess it should not really come as a surprise given the difficulty I have had getting along with them lately. The whole getting kicked off the milner blog and the rude treatment the whole family has received whenever they stay over at Garys. It is a wonder that he even pretends we are on good terms. He had me fooled.

Visiting with Anna-Maria has been fun though. I saw her play yesterday which was excellent (as far as I can say considering I do not speak French). I actually really enjoyed the show despite the language barrier and I think she under-estimates how good it actually is.

I think I may check out the World Famous West Edmonton Mall later this afternoon. Tomorrow I head back to Calgary for my 5:15pm flight to Vancouver. Look for updated posts containing the swim results. Of course I would love to get a national qualifying time, but I will be really happy with any personal best time.

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Happy Valentine’s Day

Valentine’s Day, it turns out, was not invented by Hallmark to sell cards. It is named for one of three saints recognized by the Catholic Church, and the reasons he is attached to the concept of romance are somewhat murky. Nonetheless, he was one of the more popular saints in Europe during the Middle Ages.

Now I’m off to see my Valentine, Anna-Maria, in Edmonton.

I probably won’t post again until after reading week (9 days from today).

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They’re Calling It, "The Mother of All Canadian Political Scandals"

Yesterday’s Auditor Generals report revealed a situation in Ottawa so serious and shocking as to be without precedence in our country’s history. All other previous scandals (yes, we’ve had lots of them) pale by comparison.

http://www.thestar.ca/NASApp/cs/ContentServer?pagename=thestar/Layout/Article_Type1&c=Article&cid=1076411365455&call_pageid=968332188492&col=968793972154

Feb. 10, 2004. 08:41 PM

‘Shocking‘ misuse of public funds
Martin launches public inquiry

CANADIAN PRESS

OTTAWA (CP) – The quarter-billion-dollar federal sponsorship fiasco was so widespread that even Canada‘s fabled national police force was used to funnel cash to friends of the federal government, Auditor General Sheila Fraser said today.

Fraser delivered a brutally methodical account of how the Public Works Department used Crown corporations and the RCMP to systematically shovel funds from a national-unity program to a select group of businesses.

The indictment claimed its first casualty before it was even made public. Former public works minister Alfonso Gagliano was summarily fired from his job as ambassador to Denmark by Prime Minister Paul Martin.

Gagliano‘s department ran a now-infamous sponsorship and advertising program that saw organizers of Quebec public events paid huge sums to display Canadian flags or federal logos from 1997 to 2003.

But more than $100 million – or 40 per cent of the $250 million fund – ended up in the pockets of middlemen who sometimes did nothing more than just turn over cheques, Fraser charged.

The list of mysterious transactions, enigmatic banking and blatant fraud was detailed in detached but devastating prose in her report.

Crown corporations like VIA Rail, Canada Post, and the Port of Montreal were also fingered in a report that has potentially explosive consequences ahead of an expected spring election.

“This is just such a blatant misuse of public funds. It is shocking. . . . Words escape me,” Fraser told a news conference.

“This wasn‘t just a matter of missing documentation or bending the rules. These methods were apparently designed to pay commissions to communications agencies while hiding the source of the funds.”

Each glance at her own report stirred her to outrage, Fraser said. She called for an independent inquiry into the affair.

The government immediately agreed to hold an investigation.

Justice John Gomery of the Quebec Superior Court will lead the public inquiry. Another jurist, Andre Gauthier, was named special counsel for financial recovery. Gauthier‘s job will be to launch civil suits to recover some of the squandered money.

The government has had several months to prepare its response to what turns out to be a ticking political time bomb tossed into Martin‘s lap by his predecessor, Jean Chrétien.

Fraser‘s report was supposed to be made public last November, but Chrétien prorogued Parliament which delayed the auditor general‘s indictment until he was out of office.

But Martin‘s field generals and his entire cabinet have been seized by the need to dull the sting of a blow that could ground the prime minister‘s lofty public approval ratings.

Several senior members of the government were at a meeting at 8 a.m. today. Aides could be seen lugging bulky briefing material into the Langevin building housing the prime minister‘s office.

One senior government official promised to follow the investigation wherever it might lead – even if it hurts the Liberal party.

“We‘re not interested in a witch hunt and we‘re not interested in anything that could negatively affect the party brand,” said the official.

“But at the end of the day the public interest demands that the answers to these questions be provided.

“We‘re the government. We‘re not just a political party.”

Martin immediately called the report‘s findings “intolerable” and announcing several steps to contain the damage.

“Canadians deserve better and we will deal with the findings of the auditor general‘s report in all of its facets and we will do so immediately and we will do so thoroughly,” Martin said.

He said the government will take four steps:

  1. An independent public inquiry to probe the scandal.
  2. An immediate review of the auditor‘s report by the House of Commons public accounts committee.
  3. Appoint a special counsel to recover public funds which were inappropriately attained.
  4. Introduce other measures to ensure the problems never occur again, including whistleblower protection and better management practices.

Opposition critics swiftly pounced at the scent of government blood. Their primary question: Why didn‘t Martin take action when he was finance minister in Chrétien‘s cabinet alongside Gagliano?

“Why did the prime minister stay silent when long ago he could have just said, `Stop it, this isn‘t right,” Grant Hill, the interim Conservative leader, asked in the Commons.

“The prime minister knew about the scandal and yet he said nothing and he did nothing. Why did he choose to be silent instead of speaking up?”

Martin responded that he was unaware of any wrongdoing and approved funding for the sponsorship program on the assumption that rules were being followed.

But several opposition critics predicted that closer examination of the money trail will further embarrass the prime minister and damage the reputation of the governing party.

“This was not a government operation,” NDP MP Bill Blaikie said of the sponsorship program. “This was a Liberal party operation.”

When allegations of mismanagement first surfaced two years ago, the RCMP was called in to launch a criminal investigation that has since resulted in charges against Montreal businessman Paul Coffin.

Calling in the Mounties to investigate this time will be impossible, said Conservative MP John Williams.

“They (the RCMP) have to explain why they have become involved in a money-laundering scheme. This is our national police force,” he said.

“This is a scandal of the greatest magnitude.”

The RCMP‘s 125th anniversary in 1999 turned into an embarrassing waste of taxpayer dollars, Fraser said.

Public Works contributed $3 million to a trio of ad agencies – Lafleur, Media/I.D.A. Vision and Gosselin – who were responsible for transferring the money to the RCMP.

Those three agencies took a combined $1.3 million in fees and commissions and transferred $1.7 million to the RCMP for its anniversary celebration.

Fraser‘s audit concluded that the RCMP‘s Quebec division received its payments through a separate non-government bank account, which violates the federal Financial Administration Act.

The transactions were recorded manually rather than in the RCMP‘s standard accounting system, and some of the supporting documents were subsequently destroyed.

Fraser outlined similar practices in a stamp competition organized by Canada Post; in a Via Rail-sponsored television series on hockey legend Maurice Richard; and in a project to raise $1.5 million for a giant screen TV for the federally run Port of Montreal.

The auditor general expressed two major concerns with the practice.

First, there was obviously no need to go through private middlemen to transfer cheques from a government department to a government agency or crown corporation.

And it was useless to pay federal agencies like the RCMP to display the federal logo at their events. Treasury Board guidelines required them to do it, with or without the sponsorship program, Fraser noted.

The Chrétien government created the now-infamous program as a response to the near-catastrophe of the 1995 Quebec referendum.

Federal funds were used to fund sports and cultural events – almost always in Quebec – while event organizers plastered Canadian flags and federal posters for visitors to see.

But the government used the fund to confer lavish commissions on a small group of ad agencies that acted as middlemen.

Fraser had already denounced the practice in a narrower 2002 probe that focused on $1.6 million transferred to Groupaction Marketing Inc.

She concluded at the time that the federal government broke “just about every rule in the book” in awarding contracts to the Montreal agency.

Groupaction said today it has voluntarily collaborated during each step of the audit.

But the Quebec company said it has been a victim of the situation, which caused the loss of about 100 jobs.

“It‘s important to underline that all of the work received by Groupaction were for contracts duly issued,” the company said in a news release. “That said, the absence, not to mention the apparent disappearance, of government documents has caused and continues to cause irreparable harm to Groupaction.”

Fraser‘s report released today also blasted the government in other areas. Fraser also concluded that:

The Chrétien government ignored federal contracting policies in rushing to spend $101 million on two Bombardier jets for the prime minister and other VIPs.

Indian and Northern Affairs has failed to track spending or resolve disputes linked to native land claims worth more than $1.2 billion.

Her probe into the sponsorship fiasco highlighted a number of other irregularities.

Among them was the story of a communications firm that received a $600 commission from a $5,600 grant to a Quebec college.

All the government received in return was the MP‘s name added to a mural at the college.

She also explained how the Montreal Impact soccer team received almost $150,000 in sponsorship funds during the 1998-99 indoor season.

A similar request by the Edmonton Drillers soccer team was rejected, with the government claiming no funds were available.

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Locked Out

When I left the house this morning I forgot something very important – my keys! I ran to school anyway and 40 minutes later arrived, breathless and tired. I ended up catching a ride home with Bill Onofrychuk but had to spend the day wandering around the neighbourhood until my roommate got home at 5:00. Luckily Jake was home and gave me something to eat and let me hang at his place for the afternoon. I’m NEVER going to leave my keys behind again, it’s the most frustrating experience in recent memory.

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Zero by Zero

Zero by Zero claims to have a solution for the division by zero error.

“Our society seems to be very technologically advanced. Looks like everything has been thoroughly studied but the depths of the oceans. Our mathematics is so advanced that it’s mind boggling to many people. We have built buildings way high in the sky. Bridges longer than many cities. Obviously we are capable of great technological know how. And yet it saddens me to bring this topic up at such a late stage in the game. Yes the old division by zero problem. […]”

I was always bothered that my calculator came up with an error when it seemed logical enough that the answer was actually 0. I guess I should never have automatically assumed that all the math teachers I ever had were right.