THE EMPIRE STRIKES BACK: EXTRA-SPECIAL EDITION

Somebody sent this to me on an old Intel voice / chat program many years ago (betcha didn’t know Intel used to make software). Anyway I came across it today and thought I’d share.

Interior shot: Bespin Gantry — moments later:

A furious lightsaber duel is underway. DARTH VADER is backing LUKE SKYWALKER towards the end of the gantry.

A quick move by Vader, chops off Luke’s hand! It goes spinning off into the ventilation shaft.)

Luke backs away. He looks around, but realizes there’s nowhere to go but straight down.

Darth Vader: Obi Wan never told you what happened to your father.

Luke: He told me enough! He told me you killed him!

Darth Vader: No… I am your father!

Luke: No, it’s not true! It’s impossible.

Darth Vader: Search your feelings… you know it to be true…

Luke: NO!

Darth Vader: Yes, it is true… and you know what else? You know that brass droid of yours?

Luke: Threepio?

Darth Vader: Yes… Threepio… I built him… when I was 7 years old…

Luke: No…

Darth Vader: Seven years old! And what have you done? Look at yourself, no hand, no job, and couldn’t even levitate your own ship out of the swamp…

Luke: I destroyed your precious Death Star!

Darth Vader: When you were 20! When I was 10, I single-handedly destroyed a Trade Federation Droid Control ship!

Luke: Well, it’s not my fault…

Darth Vader: Oh, here we go… “Poor me… my father never gave me what I wanted for my birthday… boo hoo, my daddy’s the Dark Lord of the Sith… waahhh wahhh!”

Luke: Shut up…

Darth Vader: You’re a slacker! By the time I was your age, I had exterminated the Jedi knights!

Luke: I used to race my T-16 through Beggar’s Canyon…

Darth Vader: Oh, for the love of the Emperor… 10 years old, winner of the Boonta Eve Open… Only human to ever fly a Pod Racer… right here baby!

Luke looks down the shaft. Takes a step towards it.

Darth Vader: I was wrong… You’re not my kid… I don’t know whose you are, but you sure ain’t mine…

Luke takes a step off the platform, hesitates, then plunges down the shaft.

Darth Vader looks after him.

Darth Vader: Get a haircut!

Giant Sea Creature Washes Ashore in India

Apparently the remains of some giant creature have washed up in India following the tsunami last December, or is it a hoax? The verdict is still out on this one, but the story and video are compelling nonetheless. Maybe it’s a blue whale, maybe it’s a dinosaur or maybe it’s just an elaborate computer generated image. You be the judge.

(via Snopes)

Surviving Prison

Kevin Kelly over at Cool Tools has a review on Behind Bars: Surviving Prison. I found the excerpts to be very interesting. It’s the kind of stuff you’d want to read before you, or someone you know was headed for the big house. Even if you’re not, it’s still interesting.

Samy is My Hero

Some guy by the name of Samy wrote a social network popularity worm for MySpace blogs and made over a million new friends in under 24 hours. The worm also added the text “but most of all, samy is my hero” in the infected users self-description / hero section. The worm source code can still be seen in the Google Cache (just search for Samy’s user id 11851658 to jump to the relevant part).

The outstanding story of the creation and spread of a MySpace worm.

Update: The folks at Google Blogoscoped have interviewed Samy.

Pallywood

I watched a short clip of Pallywood on Rocketboom, but from what I’ve seen it’s hard to say for sure whether the footage was staged or not. Some footage looks more real than others.

Pallywood, “According to Palestinian Sources…” a film by Richard Landes. International news media extract a few convincing instants of staged scenes — sight-bytes, and present them as news…

You can download Pallywood if it sparks your interest.

Update: After watching the whole thing, I’m still not convinced completely either way, but if what the documentary shows and says is true, then there is no doubt that some of the footage, used in 60 Minutes and other newscasts, was staged.

Bryan Berg – Cardstacker

Card Stacking

Bryan Berg is no ordinary card stacker. His amazing playing card creations are not only esthetically incredible, but they are also fantastic examples of the power of repetitive geometry, which prevents the cards from bending. Using no glue, no sticks, and only standard playing cards, he puts together giant playing card constructions.

See more at cardstacker.com.

(via BoingBoing)