The Bad Review Revue

Land of the Lost: “Would that a time machine actually existed that could somehow restore the 106 minutes spent watching Land of the Lost.” – Peter Keough, Boston Phoenix

The Hangover: “If a bachelor party bender is your thing, you’ve got company. I didn’t say taste.” – Jules Brenner, Cinema Signals

Star Trek: “It’s been thirty years since I last found myself at the movies, rooting for a black hole.” – Gregory Weinkauf, ÜberCiné

Night at the Museum: Smithsonian: “As for this sequel, this is one exhibit that should be closed for the summer.” – Jeffrey Lyles, Gazette (MD)

Save St. Mike’s Health Centre

A friend of mine has written a heart breaking story about his father developing Alzheimer’s. The really brutal part of the story is the sinister agenda being played out by the government. As I’ve said before, the Alberta Health Super Board is bad for Albertans and needs to be stopped.

Here is his story:

A few nights ago, I discovered my 75-year-old father trying to eat his soup with a knife.

My father — a minister for over 40 years — has Alzheimer’s dementia. The bible he once knew by heart he now struggles with like a child with his first book. He can no longer write letters of prayer and encouragements. His powers of speech are decimated, yet even so, by tangents, fumbles and gestures, he tells us every day that he wants to minister and live.

My father cannot minister again, because Alzheimer’s is killing the reasoning powers and memories he needs to live without constant care. He is sometimes delusional or will turn on his caregivers. He escapes and sometimes wanders into traffic, climbs into a stranger’s vehicle, or falls asleep in a snowbank. He can’t bathe, feed or clothe himself without help. Lately, he has struggled to swallow — a frightening portent of the end. It has only been with constant attention, minute-to-minute care by my family that our father has survived thus far.

Recently, I brought my sick father and exhausted mother to live in my Lethbridge home, which is kitty corner from St. Michael’s Health Centre. Three weeks ago, a kind staff member of St. Michael’s gave me a tour of their locked dementia unit. It was perfect: beautiful facilities, friendly, qualified staff, 24-hour nursing care, secured outdoor gardens, a greenhouse, and even a chapel. My guide also showed me an empty bed.

With the right kind of help literally within sight, I immediately called the Chinook ACCESS number to begin the process of eventually getting dad into a long-term care facility, with St. Michael’s as our primary choice. The agent, however, replied that St. Michael’s cannot be our primary choice because for the last month there has been a directive to stop all referrals to St. Michael’s. She said the government is shutting down the long term care facilities at St. Michael’s as part of a transition of senior care to designated assisted living facilities.

I immediately called an administrator of St. Michael’s to ask why they would give me a tour of the locked dementia unit for my father, if there is already a moratorium on new placements to the facility. The administrator said St. Michael’s had not been informed of the moratorium, but she indicated she was not surprised, “with the way things have been going.”

I have since heard many reasons for this “re-purposing” of St. Michael’s: that assisted living facilities fall outside of the Nursing Act, and therefore, seniors would have to pay for extra nursing services; that the Super Board is shifting nurses from senior care to be able to say there is no nursing shortage in Alberta; that St. Michael’s is slated to become new private hospital in Lethbridge. When things are done so secretly, who can know what, why, or where this is going?

In the next few years, the Alberta government means to cut 7,000 long term beds necessary for dementia patients like my father across the province, as part of the Chinook Model for senior care, for which Lethbridge is the guinea pig. Meanwhile, I have found many reports warning of a looming epidemic of Alzheimer’s, with the most conservative estimates predicting rates to triple in the population in the next two decades (www.alzheimers.ca The Rising Tide). The government is going one direction while the future is going the other.

This week after a disturbing incident, my father was certified and admitted to the hospital’s geriatric assessment unit where he will be treated and observed for 30 days while his placement options are considered. The wonderful nurses in the unit have already noted that dad cannot do the simplest things to care for himself; they, too, have seen him trying to eat his soup with a knife.

I will not allow my father — who has given his whole life to others — go some place where he will have no right to the 24-hour nursing care or protection he needs to survive, where he would certainly die before his time. I have 30 days to show Albertans what their government is doing to their parents and grandparents — that like my father’s dying brain, the Alberta Government is myopically choosing a knife where other tools are necessary.

Please help us remove the knife and keep St. Michael’s and the province’s other 7,000 long term care beds open. We have 30 days.

Sincerely,

Virgil Grandfield

Brian Mason will be in Lethbridge on Monday speaking about this health care issue (pdf) at the Public Library from 7:00-9:00pm.

Copy Protection Rant

I’m doing some work for a client this morning. I’m updating his portfolio for his acting career and ironically, trying to download the tv show which he plays in is proving to be more difficult than I imagined. The CBC is streaming the show in SWF format, however, they’ve made it nearly impossible (as far as I can tell) to save it locally.

After spending nearly a half hour trying to work it out, I finally decided to check my favourite bit torrent site. The show in question will be downloaded in about 30 minutes—so much for trying to do things the CBC’s way.

Sasquatch! Music Festival Photos

A week ago I was up early at 4:30am to ride down to the States with some friends to enjoy the festivities at the Sasquatch! Music Festival. After nearly 12 hours on the road, we arrived at the festival grounds, set up camp and watched as thousands of others did the same.

The Festival takes place in the most beautiful venue I’ve ever seen. It’s a gigantic amphitheatre called The Gorge. There were so many interesting people and so many great artists—check out some of the photos and videos I captured from the event:

Sasquatch! Music Festival 2009

[Sasquatch! Music Festival Slideshow – Flickr]

Google Wave

Google Wave LogoThe other day a friend and I were talking about the history of messaging mediums and what the next generation of communication tools will look like. Snail mail, the telegraph, the telephone, fax, email, and instant messages have each taken their turn as the communication technology of the day but we wondered what the next iteration of such technology would do and how it would either replace or compliment our existing tools.

I’m happy to say we’re about to find out. I just learned about a brand new tool that is about to change everything. Google Wave is an amazing mash-up of chat, email, blogging, event planning, and document sharing all in one. I was sceptical too, at first, but check this out (at least some of it):


[Google Wave Developer Preview at Google I/O 2009 – YouTube]

Will it mean the beginning of the end of existing social networking sites like Facebook and Twitter? How will it affect usage of collaborative tools like Sharepoint and Basecamp? Well, I’ve always felt that outside of its core search business, Google has faced an uphill battle for user acceptance. I’m still shocked when I find friends refusing to upgrade from whatever ridiculous email provider they’re using to the super efficient and powerful Gmail.

I think that Google Wave’s openness and flexibility will be enough to overcome the tipping point of adoption though because of its inherent backwards compatibility. Twitter users can tweet from Twitter, while Facebook users can update their statuses from Facebook. Meanwhile Google Wave will consolidate everything into the interface of my choice and I can even respond back without reloading my browser.

I have seen the future; it is Google Wave.

Outsourcing for Humour

Ze Frank’s been creating videos specifically for Buzz Feed. Here’s one on dealing with the economic downturn from his series Hard Times:

ShamWow Guy in Prison

Vince Shlomi, the phenomenally successful television pitchman for products like the ShamWow and Slap Chop, was arrested at a swank Miami hotel last March after a violent confrontation with a prostitute.

From The Smoking Gun:

MARCH 27 – Meet Vince Shlomi. He’s probably better known to you as the ShamWow Guy, the ubiquitous television pitchman who has been phenomenally successful peddling absorbent towels and food choppers. Shlomi, 44, was arrested last month on a felony battery charge following a violent confrontation with a prostitute in his South Beach hotel room. According to an arrest affidavit, Shlomi met Sasha Harris, 26, at a Miami Beach nightclub on February 7 and subsequently retired with her to his $750 room at the lavish Setai hotel. Shlomi told cops he paid Harris about $1000 in cash after she "propositioned him for straight sex." Shlomi said that when he kissed Harris, she suddenly "bit his tongue and would not let go." Shlomi then punched Harris several times until she released his tongue.

For those of you that are not familiar with Vince:


[Vince with Slap Chop – YouTube]

Here he is peddling the ShamWow:


[ShamWow – YouTube]

I’ve saved the best for last. Guess what he’s doing now that he’s in prison?


[Shamwow Guy in Prison – CollegeHumor]

Carousel

Carousel is a short film by Adam Berg created around the idea of a frozen moment with cops and robbers engaged in an epic shootout that includes clowns, explosions, a decimated hospital, lots of broken glass, and plenty of bullet casings.


[Carousel – YouTube]

See how clever they were with the title? It’s designed to be played as a loop.