Category: Art

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THE EMPIRE STRIKES BACK: EXTRA-SPECIAL EDITION

Somebody sent this to me on an old Intel voice / chat program many years ago (betcha didn’t know Intel used to make software). Anyway I came across it today and thought I’d share.

Interior shot: Bespin Gantry — moments later:

A furious lightsaber duel is underway. DARTH VADER is backing LUKE SKYWALKER towards the end of the gantry.

A quick move by Vader, chops off Luke’s hand! It goes spinning off into the ventilation shaft.)

Luke backs away. He looks around, but realizes there’s nowhere to go but straight down.

Darth Vader: Obi Wan never told you what happened to your father.

Luke: He told me enough! He told me you killed him!

Darth Vader: No… I am your father!

Luke: No, it’s not true! It’s impossible.

Darth Vader: Search your feelings… you know it to be true…

Luke: NO!

Darth Vader: Yes, it is true… and you know what else? You know that brass droid of yours?

Luke: Threepio?

Darth Vader: Yes… Threepio… I built him… when I was 7 years old…

Luke: No…

Darth Vader: Seven years old! And what have you done? Look at yourself, no hand, no job, and couldn’t even levitate your own ship out of the swamp…

Luke: I destroyed your precious Death Star!

Darth Vader: When you were 20! When I was 10, I single-handedly destroyed a Trade Federation Droid Control ship!

Luke: Well, it’s not my fault…

Darth Vader: Oh, here we go… “Poor me… my father never gave me what I wanted for my birthday… boo hoo, my daddy’s the Dark Lord of the Sith… waahhh wahhh!”

Luke: Shut up…

Darth Vader: You’re a slacker! By the time I was your age, I had exterminated the Jedi knights!

Luke: I used to race my T-16 through Beggar’s Canyon…

Darth Vader: Oh, for the love of the Emperor… 10 years old, winner of the Boonta Eve Open… Only human to ever fly a Pod Racer… right here baby!

Luke looks down the shaft. Takes a step towards it.

Darth Vader: I was wrong… You’re not my kid… I don’t know whose you are, but you sure ain’t mine…

Luke takes a step off the platform, hesitates, then plunges down the shaft.

Darth Vader looks after him.

Darth Vader: Get a haircut!

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Pallywood

I watched a short clip of Pallywood on Rocketboom, but from what I’ve seen it’s hard to say for sure whether the footage was staged or not. Some footage looks more real than others.

Pallywood, “According to Palestinian Sources…” a film by Richard Landes. International news media extract a few convincing instants of staged scenes — sight-bytes, and present them as news…

You can download Pallywood if it sparks your interest.

Update: After watching the whole thing, I’m still not convinced completely either way, but if what the documentary shows and says is true, then there is no doubt that some of the footage, used in 60 Minutes and other newscasts, was staged.

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The Face of Dr. Claw Revealed!

As any child of the 80’s can tell you, Inspector Gadget was a pretty sweet cartoon. I always wanted one of those computer books that Inspector Gadget’s niece, Penny, used to foil the M.A.D. crew. It was the most powerful computer ever imagined – even today it would totally own even the most powerful super computer.

I always thought that in the final episode they would reveal Dr. Claw’s face and I just assumed that since I never saw the final episode I just happened to miss it. Well it turns out the show never did reveal his face but now it has been revealed!

(Actually it’s been revealed for over a decade but you can read the details here.)

Continue reading “The Face of Dr. Claw Revealed!”